One of the most important things I've learnt so far in life is the importance of my "space". I like to think of this "space" as a garden--where the things I allow in take root and start to bear fruit that become thoughts, reactions/responses, habits, mindsets and eventually, a lifestyle. And like a garden, this space needs attention. I'm no expert, but I believe there's 3 important things a garden needs; fencing, weeding and nurturing (feeding).
Fence your space
Every single day, so many different things try to get into your space, both negative and positive. I can imagine no one actually wants negativity in their space. But it is obviously not as clear cut as hearing a knock on the door and looking through the peephole to see if you want to open the door to the marketer or not. The mind, unfortunately is a bit more complicated than that. That's why it is important to build a strong fence around your space by resisting any form of negativity. And the more you do, the stronger your fence becomes. It is usually easier to resist negativity when you deal with it right away coz I find that the longer you let it linger, the more insisting power you give it and the harder it gets to kick it out.
Weed your space
Because we're not perfect, or usually don't get the chance to start with a clean slate, chances are there are already some things in your space that really shouldn't be there. And ignoring them is not an option, coz as insignificant as we may want to convince ourselves that they are, they can ruin your space, maybe not right now, but someday. So get rid of them. Sometimes, that means saying "no" enough times till the offers stop coming in, having honest conversations with people around you, walking away from toxic people and situations etc.
Nurture your space
So rather than dwelling in reactive mode, fending off negative darts, I find that it is even better to be proactive about your space. Coz your space is only as strong as its content. And you can do this by making a conscious effort about exposing yourself to the things that you want more of--whether it is the right environment physically, positive people, uplifting music, motivational speakers, experts in your field/industry, etc. And create the space you want to dwell in.
"Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse."
- Philippians 4:8
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